a banana republic manager in an alternate universe

[four new men have recently come forward to admit sexual "encounters" with senator larry craig (R-ID).]

dear senator larry craig,

oh, larry. i really do feel for you. and your wife. (because she has totally known "all along," even if you do manage to [somehow] have sex from time to time).

if you hadn't been raised somehow to equate homosexuality with evil, and if you hadn't been too ashamed of your feelings for men, and if you hadn't hidden those "shameful" urges from everyone and then went on to become active in a political party that talks about everything in absolutes (heaven and hell, right and wrong, you're with us or against us) ... you might've really had an interesting, fun, relaxed, entertaining life just being a gay man.

think of how liberating, larry! you could have sex with men ALL the time and the only people who would give a shit would be closed-minded assholes that you don't care about anyway! you could own DVDs of every musical ever made and not care what anyone thinks. you could spend a whole weekend in europe, just shoe shopping, damn them all. you could've been an awesome gay senator! you could enjoy wearing scarves and throwing fabulous parties with tasteful wine and desserts. you could belt out britney and cristina at karaoke bars and LOVE IT.

or you could've done anything else, all stereotypes aside. (yes, you could still be in the NRA, seriously).

but instead, you chose your path as republican senator, as a straight man. and because you can only run so hard for so long from who you really are in your heart, you have had lapses. and now everyone knows about them, not just the minneapolis airport one.

but larry, there's still hope! that's right! it's never too late to admit the truth. and it's not like you've committed a crime (men's room incident aside) by being gay for christ's sake. think of the new life you could enjoy when you're free to be who you are! there's so much living left to do. to quote one of my favorite starbucks "the way i see it" cups (#43), by writer armistead maupin:

My only regret about being gay is that I repressed it for so long. I surrendered my youth to the people I feared when I could have been out there loving someone. Don't make that mistake yourself. Life's too damn short.

yours sincerely,
:) sylvia